Are you one of those people who focus on the common aspects of things or, on the contrary, are you one of those who focus on the differences? Are you one of those who prefer to put out the fire or are you often the one who lights the fuse, metaphorically speaking? Within the framework of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, reference is made to two basic metaprograms that we usually use to make comparisons: the equalizer and the comparator.
What are metaprograms?
Metaprograms are a kind of filter that mediates our perception. Since we are exposed to so much information every day and we are not able to process it all, we put these filters in place to focus only on certain “pieces” of reality. Obviously, these “pieces” of reality do not enter our consciousness at random. This is where metaprograms come into play, the models we use to determine what information we let in and what we exclude.
Let’s take a classic example, that of a glass of water that is half full. Is it half full or half empty?
In reality, the glass is half full and half empty, both statements are true but, at the same time, they are different and show a different underlying metaprogram. One point of view is not better than another, both are useful, depending on the circumstances.
Once we have a metaprogram model and we have found it to be relatively effective, we use it constantly to filter the world and even to analyze our experiences. Obviously, there are many models, one of the most interesting being the “equalizer-differentiator” model.
A very simple test to find out which metaprogram you follow when comparing
Look at the image below and describe what you see.
This model refers to the conclusions we draw when comparing things. However, there are four possible answers.
– Equalizers will say that there are three equal triangles because they perceive and focus more on similarities, they have the tendency to match and think more globally. Normally, they are people who feel comfortable in the same places, who do not like to change. They can feel satisfied doing the same job for years and they are very attached to rituals and habits.
– People who are able to perceive equality with exception . These people first observe the similarities and then focus on the differences, so they will probably say that there are two equal triangles and one different one. Usually, these are people who like changes but only if they occur gradually; they are willing to evolve but little by little. In their usual vocabulary, they use many comparatives, such as “better, worse, more or less.”
– Differentiators , who prefer to focus on the unevenness, the uniqueness of each thing. In this case, they will say that there are three different triangles, which is also true. Obviously, these are people who seek change, need it, and enjoy variety. They are attracted to innovative products and relationships, which represent something different from what they have already experienced.
– People who are able to notice differences with exception . At first these people notice the differences and then focus on the similarities. They will say that the triangles are different and two of them point upwards. Normally these are people who seek change and variety but not as much as the differentiators.
Is it better to be an equalizer or a differentiator?
No model is better than another, they are just different. In some situations it is very convenient to be an equalizer because it allows us to adopt a conciliatory stance, such as when we need to reach an agreement and there are two opposing positions. In other circumstances it would be more appropriate to be a differentiator, such as when creating a new product or making constructive criticism.
Each model has its pros and cons. Equalizers may miss good opportunities for growth simply because they are unable to see them or because they are not sufficiently attracted to change. Differentiators, on the other hand, often find themselves involved in arguments because they are more likely to point out the differences.
The most important thing is not to be differentiating or equalizing, but to be aware of the model that we often use and have the flexibility to change it as circumstances demand.
Source:
O’Connor, J. & Seymour, J. (1995) Introduction to NLP . Barcelona: Ediciones Urano.
