In recent years, mainly due to the popularization of Positive Psychology, many Personal Growth gurus encourage us to never give up, to not give up on our efforts, to not abandon the path we have set out for ourselves. However, in the business field, good entrepreneurs know perfectly well that detecting the moment to give up is as important as knowing how to appreciate opportunities, otherwise, they will only waste time, money and effort.
In everyday life, it is also important to know when to give up, because perseverance and stubbornness are divided by a very fine line that we do not always know how to distinguish precisely, especially when emotions are involved. There are some situations in which giving up is the smartest alternative. It may be that you have set a goal that is now unfeasible because the circumstances around you have changed, or that you have made a mistake when choosing the objective, or that it is no longer as interesting to you as before. There are many reasons, but the common factor is the same: persisting does you more harm than giving up.
Where does the resistance to give up come from?
We do not give our best if we do not consider our goal or relationship to be valuable. This means that we are the ones who put the spoke in our wheel, who deceive ourselves or refuse to see the reality. In fact, the problem is that sometimes we give exaggerated value to things, we believe that something is more desirable or that we will not be able to live without it, when in reality it is not so. This becomes the main obstacle that leads us to persist in carrying out a project or in a relationship that has no future and that only uselessly consumes our strength.
It is likely that at the beginning we were fully convinced that our purpose was valid, but as we advance along the path, we discover that we are overcome by a feeling of emptiness or perhaps we are caught up in a hurricane of emotions and conflicts that wear us down. At that moment, we can resort to rationalization to explain what is happening to us, thinking that they are obstacles in the way and that we have to persist, but when the feeling of discomfort does not leave us, the time has come to stop and rethink some things.
Making this decision is not easy because we are emotionally tied to those projects or relationships that were once meaningful to us and also because giving up implies, in some way or another, facing a certain degree of uncertainty. In fact, another of the reasons that prevent us from abandoning a project or relationship is the fear of accepting that we are wrong or the reluctance to change our plans due to fear of the unknown. However, in some cases, it is the smartest decision.
The signs that tell you that you should give up
– You have constant doubts about the project or the relationship, questions for which you cannot find satisfactory answers.
– Instead of experiencing satisfaction, the feeling of anguish becomes increasingly intense.
– As you move forward on the path, you do not experience the happiness you expected but instead you feel a great emptiness.
– You begin to function mechanically, through the power of habits, but you find no satisfaction in what you do because those activities no longer fulfill you as they did before.
– When you take stock of your results, you realize that the energy, time and resources you are using to achieve that goal far exceed the benefits and satisfaction you obtain.
– When your mental or physical health begins to suffer.
As a final point, always remember the words of Henry Ward Beecher: “The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won’t.”
