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Home » Personal Growth » How to make decisions without regret? The secret is in the unconscious

How to make decisions without regret? The secret is in the unconscious

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how to make decisions without regret

Making good decisions is not easy, especially when we have to deal with a high degree of uncertainty and we cannot foresee the consequences of our actions. That is why it is sometimes convenient to let our sixth sense speak, to let ourselves be guided by that hunch that tells us what would be best in the situation we are in.

In fact, Sigmund Freud used to say: “When it comes to making a trivial decision, I have always found it advantageous to consider the pros and cons. In vital matters, however, the decision must come from the unconscious, from somewhere within.”

What choosing a painting teaches us 

Imagine your boss asks you to go buy a modern art painting for the office. However, when you get to the gallery, you only find five paintings, how would you choose?

One possibility is to think about the pros and cons of each piece, taking into account your boss’s personality, the image the company wants to convey, as well as the existing decor in the office. Or you could trust your instinct and choose the painting that “makes you feel good.”

According to the most recent research, the latter is the best option.

In fact, a few years ago psychologists at the University of Amsterdam conducted just such an experiment: They asked a group of people to look at five paintings and choose one. The first group was asked to study the paintings for a minute and a half, list some of the key reasons why they liked or disliked each one, analyze them carefully, and then choose.

The second group was simply asked to look at the five pictures and choose one immediately.

The third group was quickly shown the boxes, asked to solve a series of anagrams for five minutes, and then shown the boxes again to decide.

After making their choices, all participants were asked to indicate how much they liked the paintings. The experimenter then had a burst of generosity and gave them their favourite painting. However, before each person left the laboratory, he asked them for their telephone number.

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A month later, the researchers contacted the participants and asked them how satisfied they were with their paintings, whether they would be willing to sell them, and for how much. The results were, to say the least, surprising.

The people who had carefully weighed the pros and cons had been very confident about their choice in the lab. Four weeks later, however, the picture changed: those who had spent a few minutes solving anagrams before selecting the paintings were the ones who reported the greatest satisfaction with their selection and the ones who asked for a higher price for the painting, as a sign that they were not willing to part with the work of art so easily.

The unconscious is a very powerful ally that knows you perfectly.

In practice, everything seems to indicate that in order to make a good decision (meaning a decision that we are satisfied with over time, a decision that we do not regret), it is important not to think too much, at least not in a rational way, and to let the unconscious draw its own conclusions. This is what is known as “Intuitive Intelligence“.

In fact, many psychologists believe that we should harness more of the power of our unconscious mind, not only as a source of creativity but also to make better decisions. Why?

In practice, when we have to decide between different alternatives that differ from each other in only a few aspects, our conscious mind is our best ally since it can evaluate the situation rationally and show us the best path.

However, when things get complex, as our conscious mind has limited processing capacity and cannot juggle a large number of facts and figures, the result it gives us is not so good.

In that case, what happens is that instead of assessing the situation as a whole, the conscious mind tends to focus on the most obvious elements and, in doing so, ignores the bigger picture. In contrast, the unconscious mind works better when it comes to making complex decisions that cover many aspects of our lives because it is able to assess the big picture.

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Furthermore, we cannot forget that our unconscious mind is in touch with our repressed impulses and parts of our “self” that we barely know. Therefore, it is in a position to balance our sense of duty with our desires and impulses. As a result, we are likely to feel better about the decision in the long run.

To engage the unconscious and listen to what it has to say, it is necessary to give it time to examine all the factors and arrive at a more balanced decision. An excellent strategy is to immerse ourselves in another activity, keep the conscious mind occupied with another task, and then return to the decision.

Always choose with the unconscious?

Real-life decisions are often much more complicated than choosing a painting. Therefore, it could also be a mistake to let ourselves be carried away by that impulse that comes from the depths of our “self”.

The ideal is to find a middle ground between the conscious and unconscious mind. Evaluate the alternatives rationally but be sure to listen to what your unconscious has to say. If your instinct pushes you in a direction, don’t ignore it, investigate why you are attracted to that alternative.

It may not be a bad decision, and in the long run, even if you don’t gain much from a certain point of view, you could gain in satisfaction and motivation.

References:

Wiseman, R. (2009) 59 seconds.Think a litle, change a lot. Nueva York: Alfred A. Knopf.

Dijksterhuis, A., & van Olden, Z. (2006) On the benefits of thinking unconsciously: Unconscious thought increases post-choice satisfaction. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology; 42: 627–631.

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Jennifer Delgado

Psychologist Jennifer Delgado

I am a psychologist (Registered at Colegio Oficial de la Psicología de Las Palmas No. P-03324) and I spent more than 20 years writing articles for scientific journals specialized in Health and Psychology. I want to help you create great experiences. Learn more about me.

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