The most ambitious and satisfying projects are often uphill, demanding a great deal of sacrifice and perseverance. That’s why we can sometimes lose strength and drive halfway through. At that point, we may be tempted to throw in the towel.
The problem is that we only look forward, we only perceive the path we still have to travel and we don’t realize how far we have come. However, sometimes it is necessary to look back to understand the true magnitude of what we have achieved. Sometimes looking back gives us the strength to move forward.
Unfortunately, we often give up on our dreams just because we are not fully aware of the things we have achieved, the small steps we have taken. When we focus only on failures, we lose motivation and risk giving up just when we are about to reach our goal.
This is due, in part, to the fact that our society has only taught us to punish ourselves for mistakes, but not to reward ourselves for each achievement. In the field of Personal Growth, this reality is even more evident. We plan transcendental changes, but when a regression occurs, we become demotivated and give up, without realizing everything we had achieved. Therefore, from time to time it is necessary to take stock of our achievements; it is likely that we are growing emotionally without realizing it.
What are the signs that you are growing emotionally?
1. You let go of things that hurt you
Learning to let go, focusing on the things that are truly worthwhile and ignoring those that hurt or bother us, is a key skill for success and, above all, for achieving emotional balance. However, it is also a very difficult skill to develop. Therefore, the simple fact of learning to recognize toxic people and knowing how to deal with their behavior without generating guilt or anger is already a great step. Congratulate yourself for it because few people achieve it.
2. You learn from mistakes
No one is perfect, no one can claim to have never made a mistake. Therefore, getting rid of perfectionism and accepting that mistakes are part of the path and that they are even valuable, is an unequivocal sign that you have matured. When we understand mistakes as opportunities to grow, our perspective changes completely and we can undertake more ambitious projects without fear of getting stuck halfway. Then we know that each mistake is not a regression but one more step that brings us closer to the goal.
3. You stop complaining
Complaints are often a black hole through which energy escapes because they do not lead to solutions but only generate even greater discomfort that makes us see the world through a grey prism. However, the most balanced and successful people do not have the habit of crying over spilt milk; they immediately get down to work and try to turn the problem around. If you are acting more and complaining less, it is because you are growing emotionally.
4. You celebrate the success of others
Applauding people’s success is a sign of maturity, it indicates that you do not envy them and that you understand that their success does not mean that you have failed. Being able to recognize the work and effort of others, instead of launching derogatory criticism, not only contributes to creating a good climate but also implies a change of attitude that will benefit you.
5. Your personal relationships are less conflictive
The world is not full of conflict, there are just egos that are too big to clash with each other and give rise to conflicts that could have been avoided. Part of maturity means stopping seeing interpersonal relationships as a battlefield where there are winners and losers. When your relationships are more fluid, you manage to work better and feel more comfortable, it is because you have matured and have learned that it is better to have peace than to be right.
6. You are not afraid to ask for help
Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re weak. In fact, it’s a sign of strength and self-confidence. No person has ever been able to grow and succeed in isolation; they need others. Asking for help means that you’ve recognized that you can’t accomplish some things on your own and that you’re humble enough to recognize that and rely on others.
7. You have raised your standards
As we mature, we become more aware of what we want and what we are not willing to allow. A mature person is self-assured and sets certain boundaries that others must not cross. Of course, these are not capricious boundaries, but rules that allow you to protect your rights and maintain your psychological balance. Raising your standards is a sign that you value yourself and are not willing to allow others to upset your psychological balance.
8. You have learned to open up emotionally
Love is risky. Loving means giving yourself away and, consequently, exposing yourself to being hurt by someone. That is why many people are afraid to commit and close themselves off when someone gets close. However, when we mature emotionally, we realize that the best bet is to open our hearts. It is true that we can be rejected or hurt, but we will have the certainty that we have lived, treasured experiences and emotionally connected with someone who is significant to us.
9. You don’t care what others think
Obviously, the opinions of the people around you are important, but at a certain point in life, they should become just suggestions, not guidelines that determine your life. Maturity comes when you are able to live with others without being influenced too much by the expectations they have of you, when you manage to find your place in the world, a place where you feel comfortable and can fulfill yourself.
10. You accept your limitations and work to be your best version
Emotional maturity does not mean developing a naive positivism. A mature person is aware of his or her limitations, knows that there are many things that he or she cannot change or that are beyond his or her reach. However, this does not depress him or her. On the contrary, it allows him or her to focus on situations that he or she can really influence. In this way, he or she is able to economize his or her strength and use it where it can really reap benefits. You know that you are not perfect, but every day you strive to be the best version of yourself. And that is more than enough.
Remember that “ life is not about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself ,” according to Irish writer George Bernard Shaw.
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