Stress Relief Techniques that Work – And Those That Don’t

Relieving stress is not easy, as anyone who has experienced it knows. There are situations that simply overwhelm us and exceed our psychological resources, and in those moments we feel at the limit, tense and irritable. Many of these situations cannot be avoided. However, we can learn to deal with stress because, at the end of the day, our perception of the situation and the attitude we face in it count for a lot.

Now, a particularly interesting study conducted at North Carolina State University  reveals the most effective techniques for relieving stress and also tells us which strategies we tend to adopt but which don’t work.

These researchers recruited 43 people and followed them throughout their daily activities for eight days. They were thus able to assess first-hand not only the situations that caused the most stress but also their way of coping with them and the emotions they generated. These people were also asked to anticipate the stressful events they might face the next day and to plan how to deal with them.

Obviously, at the end of the study, the researchers noticed that people used different strategies to deal with stress. However, two techniques were particularly ineffective, since they considerably worsened people’s mood.

– Stagnant reflection.  In this case, the person reflects a lot on the problem but not on its causes or possible solutions, so this technique only serves to increase the level of stress. In practice, it is like a dog biting its tail, since the person returns again and again to the same arguments, trapping themselves in a vicious circle that increases anxiety.

– Fantasizing about the consequences.  In this case, people imagined the worst possible scenarios, fantasizing about the consequences that a certain situation would have. Obviously, projecting the future in such negative terms only serves to increase stress and anxiety, not to find solutions.

5 Strategies That Actually Work to Relieve Stress

1. Reframing the situation.  We tend to think of events as positive or negative, but we don’t realize that our expectations and the way we deal with them will largely determine their emotional impact. That’s why one of the most effective techniques for relieving stress is reframing the situation, thinking about the positive aspects. For example, if you have to give a speech in public and you feel nervous, think of it as an opportunity to test your skills and grow as a person.
2. Take a global perspective.  We often get stressed out by small details, by inconsequential things that later make us laugh. This is because at the time we are so distracted that we don’t see the bigger picture. Therefore, to deal with stress, we sometimes have to take a step back and try to capture the whole situation. When we are able to see an event in its true magnitude, including our reaction to it, we usually manage to calm down because we realize that we have exaggerated. In addition, this way you can also glimpse solutions because before you couldn’t see the forest for the trees.
3. Adjust expectations. Often, it is not the situations themselves that stress us out, but our own expectations. When we have expectations that are too high and they are not met, we become frustrated and feel anxious because things did not go as we had planned. Therefore, learning to be flexible, adjust our expectations and embrace uncertainty is the best strategy to eliminate the word stress from our vocabulary.
4. Write about the event. Giving free rein to our emotions is not always positive; sometimes it can have a counterproductive effect, as it further intensifies the discomfort. In these cases, the best thing to do is to write about what we feel. When we write, we can reflect and in this process of introspection, we do not let ourselves be assaulted by emotions but find alternative solutions. In fact, a study on the therapeutic power of a pencil revealed that people who wrote about negative events not only felt better, but also took a more proactive attitude and obtained better results when dealing with stressful situations.
5. Accept the situation. Sometimes we don’t have the power to influence the course of certain events. When we can’t do anything to change them, we simply have to accept them because denying them or fighting them is not only stressful but also exhausting. When you decide not to swim against the tide, you will feel better immediately. For example, a noise that interrupts your workflow can become a stressor that prevents you from finishing a project if you give in to anger. However, if you listen to the noise and decide to continue despite it, you are taking away its power and its ability to stress you out. Breathe and say to yourself: “everything is fine, I was able to continue.”