Dreams are a “laboratory” for testing your relationships, according to science

Dreams have fascinated us for centuries, though they have held different meanings across cultures. For the ancient Egyptians, they were messages from the gods, a privileged way to anticipate the future and understand the unseen. For the Greeks, on the other hand, they could be symbolic visits from the divine world that required interpretation.

Over time, that mystical aura gave way to a more psychological perspective. Sigmund Freud understood them as the disguised expression of unconscious desires, while Carl Jung conceived of them as a symbolic language connected to universal archetypes. Today, far from disappearing, this interest remains very much alive in science. Many neuroscientists continue to wonder what purpose dreams serve.

Indeed, a recent study published in the journal Dreaming suggests that our dreams function as a complex simulation space where we practice how to deal with social challenges. The research suggests that dreams are not random images, but rather structured around the same fundamental needs we experience during the day.

The 3 recurring concerns around which our dreams revolve

Researchers at Coker University recruited 315 people between the ages of 18 and 64 and asked them to describe their most recent dream, aiming for the freshest and most accurate details possible. Two experts then analyzed each dream narrative, and if they disagreed on their interpretation, a third expert intervened to tip the scales.

Thus they discovered that the 3 most frequent themes in dreams were:

1. Self-protection, which involved escaping emotional danger or physical aggression. This concern manifested in dreams where people were pursued or had to face threats from a former partner.
2. Status, related to aspects such as competence, success, or fear of failure. These concerns were expressed in dreams where people were judged by someone, failed an exam, or didn’t pass an interview.
3. Family care and belonging are related to the need to maintain stable relationships and feel part of a group or place. In these dreams, people were worried about losing their partner or another family member, indicating that preserving existing bonds is more important than establishing new relationships.

“Our findings suggest that dreams connect our underlying desires and motivations with how we navigate the social world,” these researchers stated. In practice, our brain prioritizes survival and social standing, even while we sleep.

In fact, researchers hypothesize that dreams are a “simulation space,” meaning the brain uses them to practice various social roles and test different responses. Therefore, they could help us hone our social skills when we’re awake.

What are dreams for? The threat simulation theory

This idea aligns with a broader line of research known as the “threat simulation theory,” proposed by neuroscientist Antti Revonsuo. According to this approach, dreams function as an evolutionary training system: the brain recreates potentially dangerous situations, such as chases, losses, or conflicts, to rehearse responses without having to pay the real price of the experience.

In other words, dreaming isn’t a “glitch” in the system, but rather a kind of biological laboratory where we hone our reaction time and test our skills. In fact, this neuroscientist found that severely traumatized children reported a greater number of dreams with threatening elements. It was often thought that these kinds of dreams were due to post-traumatic stress, but they could also be the brain’s way of testing strategies for dealing with such situations.

Over time, this idea has expanded beyond physical threats to include the social aspect as well. After all, in everyday life we ​​not only need to survive, but also to be accepted, to feel a sense of belonging, and to maintain our position within the group.

From this perspective, dreams begin to resemble an extremely sophisticated social simulator: a mental environment where we rehearse difficult conversations, rejections, evaluations, or status conflicts. In fact, it’s no coincidence that many of our dreams revolve around situations like being late, being judged, or losing the approval of someone important.

Undoubtedly, it’s a compelling idea because dreams wouldn’t be a parallel world disconnected from daily life, but rather an extension of it in the form of a simulation. They would be a space where the brain anticipates scenarios, tests versions of ourselves, and adjusts strategies without us realizing it and, above all, without suffering the consequences of making mistakes. From this perspective, sleeping wouldn’t be disconnecting from the world, but rather continuing to inhabit it in another format.

References:

Thomas, F.; Andrews, K. & Leavitt, C. (2026) Dreams and fundamental social motives: Evidence from 397 narratives. Dreaming. Advance online publication; 10.1037.

Revonsuo, A. et. Al. (2005) The threat simulation theory of the evolutionary function of dreaming: Evidence from dreams of traumatized children. Conscious Cogn; 14(1): 188-218.