The greatest source of dissatisfaction is not reality, adversity or obstacles, but our expectations. We are our own main enemy because, when our expectations are too high and do not correspond to reality, we run the risk of breaking down. In fact, one of the essential characteristics of resilient people is having adequate, objective and contextualized expectations.
However, in order to generate expectations that guide our steps along the right path, it is not enough to be aware of our potential and limitations, but we must also have a realistic image of the world around us. Unfortunately, with the rise of positivism in the world of Psychology, many people have lost, in a certain way, contact with reality, thus feeding unrealistic expectations that later lead to frustration and make failure taste even more bitter. However, we must bear in mind that unrealistic expectations not only do not bring us closer to our goals but they make us more vulnerable people.
Therefore, from time to time it is convenient to remember some life lessons that can make us stronger people or, at least, more conscious and proactive.
What are the life lessons you should always keep in mind?
- There may not be a tomorrow
Chances are, many people are planning for a tomorrow that won’t come right now. It’s one of life’s saddest lessons, but it’s also terrifyingly true. All we have is the present, so we might as well use it wisely, because the future is uncertain.
- Life is not easy
To make our dreams come true, we must work hard. Success is built day after day, it does not come with strokes of luck. Behind every successful person, there is always a story of sacrifice. The sooner we understand this reality, the sooner we can get to work to achieve what we want.
The feeling of control makes us feel comfortable and safe. However, most of the important things in life are beyond our control. That means that, instead of investing time and effort in trying to control them, it is better to learn to accept uncertainty and develop tools to deal with insecurity about the future.
- Information is not knowledge
Having information does not necessarily mean understanding. In fact, the most important life lessons often come from direct experience. Only through our experiences can we grow and understand the true magnitude of many things. It is necessary to experience, fall and get back up.
- It is impossible to change the past
No one can go back and start over, but we have the chance to begin building a new ending today. There is no point in regretting what happened because we cannot change it, but we can change our reaction to that event. Remember that only when we accept the past, we are free from it and truly free to build a new future.
- You don’t get anything without giving something in return
As much as society has insisted on telling us that we can have everything we want, the truth is that in order to achieve great things, to implement transcendental changes, we will always be forced to give up something. Moving forward also means leaving possessions, customs or even people behind.
- There will always be people we don’t like.
No matter how hard we try, there will always be people who don’t agree with our ideas or ways of acting and who, in the end, will become an obstacle to achieving our goals. However, there is no point in complaining or trying to please them. Instead, we should concentrate on doing what really satisfies us, being faithful to our values. We can’t please everyone, but it is important that we feel satisfied with ourselves.
- Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional
Sooner or later, pain will knock on our door. Adversity, the loss of loved ones, and even illness are inevitable. However, we can choose how to react to these circumstances, we can learn from them and grow in the face of problems, or, on the contrary, we can let them defeat us. Remember that it is in great adversity that we discover how far we are capable of going.
- There will always be someone better
Life is not a competition to be the best, it is a path to find happiness. The unbridled race to accumulate more possessions or to be more successful often only leads to a state of permanent dissatisfaction. On the contrary, accepting ourselves and understanding that the most important thing is not the final result but the path, is the key to living more fully. Do not forget that what you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you have become by trying to achieve them.
- The only person who can make us happy is ourselves.
The seed of happiness is found within us. The people around us and external conditions can give us fleeting moments of happiness, but it is our attitude that determines whether that state will be stable over time or will fade away. Happiness is a personal decision that is made here and now, it is not necessary to subject it to any condition.
