One afternoon, a wise man arrived in the city of Akbar accompanied by his most faithful disciple.
People didn’t attach much importance to his presence, and his teachings didn’t take root among the city’s inhabitants. In fact, over time, he became the object of laughter and ridicule among some.
The disciple felt very bad about the treatment his master was receiving. Little by little, he grew very angry and couldn’t understand why his master didn’t put an end to it or simply leave the city.
One day, while walking along Akbar’s main street, a group of men and women began insulting him. Instead of pretending to ignore them, the sage approached them and blessed them.
The disciple could not bear that situation any longer, for which he also blamed his teacher, and asked him:
– Is it possible you haven’t heard what they’ve said to you? They’ve shouted horrible things at you, and you only respond with beautiful words!
– Each of us can only offer what we have.
It was the wise man’s response.
Be careful, emotions are contagious and the image of the world is transmitted
There are people who behave like garbage trucks: they carry within themselves enormous rage, frustration, hopelessness, or fear, and they vent these feelings in every interaction. In reality, we can’t even blame them since, as the fable master explains, everyone offers what they have.
Our behaviors and attitudes are simply an expression of what we feel and think. We relate to others as we are; we cannot behave differently. However, associating with toxic people often comes at a huge emotional price.
When we listen to someone who is fearful about life every day, they’re likely to infect us with their fears. When we listen to someone who complains about everything and is never satisfied, they’re likely to infect us with their way of seeing the world, and we’ll put on a pair of gray glasses ourselves. When we interact with people who respond with anger, we’re likely to begin to think of such reactions as normal and assume anger is a valid coping strategy.
After all, our essence isn’t immutable; it changes depending on the circumstances and relationships we maintain. That’s why it’s so important to carefully select the people we interact with on a daily basis, those we allow into our lives, and, of course, those we give the opportunity to change us.
Obviously, it’s not about living in fear that others will “contaminate” our essence. However, we need to protect those qualities that make us unique and special. We must care for the garden in which our interpersonal relationships flourish and be prepared to pull out the weeds when necessary. If we don’t, those weeds can end up covering or even drying out the rest of the plants, the ones we should have cultivated and cared for with great care.
How to protect our essence?
Every so often, it’s a good idea to look back and examine our conscience, to see what kind of person we’ve become. We tend to think our essence is invariable, but that’s not the case: we change with experience, even if we don’t always realize it.
Over the years, we can become tougher and less sensitive, more materialistic and less grateful people… That’s why it’s a good idea to look within ourselves for the qualities we want to preserve and develop, to ensure we don’t lose them along the way.
On the other hand, it’s essential that we embrace the idea that it states: what others say and do is their problem; how we react is ours. Sometimes it’s difficult to maintain equanimity, and we probably won’t always succeed, but at least we can try.
Don’t respond to anger with anger and to despair with despair, because that will only plant those seeds inside you, and if you don’t remove them in time, they’re likely to grow and destroy everything in their path.
Remember that life is too short to let others impose their rules and worldview. Don’t let them take away the good in you.
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