“You have to be living in the moment” is one of the advices that is repeated everywhere. We find it on Instagram walls and on mugs, adorning t-shirts and it has even found its way into movies and advertising.
This phrase has resonated with many people because embracing the here and now has its advantages: less stress and more joy; less thinking and more letting go. It’s like finding the holy grail of eternal satisfaction, but when something seems too good to be true, it probably isn’t.
What is NOT living in the moment?
The popularization of this ancient advice has led to its distortion, giving rise to misinterpretations that are quite far from its original meaning. On many occasions, living in the present is understood as letting go of inhibitions or letting yourself be carried away by the impulses of the moment. People assume that it is an invitation to let go, put aside self-control and give in to temptations.
Many also believe that it means acting without thinking or letting yourself be carried away by circumstances without reflecting on the consequences. They think that it is about becoming leaves moved by the wind that offer no resistance – neither to external nor internal stimuli.
However, living in the moment is not that.
And it is not a 100% guarantee of happiness either. Living in the present is not some kind of magic formula that automatically equals being happy. Giving in to impulses does not always lead to positive results. In fact, it can sometimes lead to more problems and conflicts, causing us to become reckless or dismissive.
Of course, it is true that happiness is experienced in the present. There is no other way. As Thich Nhat Hanh said: “Life is only available in the present moment.” But that does not mean that living in the present guarantees happiness. Logic dictates that if it rains, we should take out the umbrella, but taking out the umbrella will not make it rain. Unfortunately, when it comes to our emotional universe, rationality is less clear and often abandons us.
What does it really mean to live in the moment?
Living in the moment is more related to our ability to be fully present in the here and now. In fact, this advice is the pillar on which ancient Taoist and Buddhist philosophies have been developed, which have always promoted mindfulness as a way to take advantage of life and connect with the essence of the universe.
Being able to live in the moment does not just mean being attentive, but being aware of what is happening – both inside and outside. It is paying attention to what is happening around us, but also being aware of our emotions and thoughts. Therefore, it is often preceded by a journey of inner discovery as we cannot be in the here and now if our mind is elsewhere.
The difficult mission of living in the here and now
To live fully in the present we must first get rid of many of the fears, expectations, preconceived beliefs or simply that mental chaos that automatic thoughts create and prevent us from being in the here and now.
To silence this inner dialogue, we need to eliminate the cause, so we must pay attention with interest and curiosity, but without judging or jumping to conclusions. We have to pay attention to how we act, but also to the thoughts that cross our minds and what we feel.
Paying attention to our bodily sensations will help us lose our fear of exploring our emotional universe. This way we will stop repressing it, but we will not let ourselves be carried away by it.
As we learn to explore what we feel, the thinking calms down. This will allow us to be less reactive and will give us the opportunity to notice what is happening around us and why it is happening, which will allow us to act accordingly. It is not about controlling but about discovering and understanding new things or those that had always been there, but that we had not noticed.
Being aware, therefore, becomes a tool to better understand reality, and in the process, understand ourselves better and resolve those latent conflicts that prevent us from being happy. Since it is impossible to be in the present and, at the same time, escape discomfort, we must focus on breaking down these internal barriers.
The right attitude to take advantage of the benefits of living in the moment
If we get caught up in searching for fleeting moments of happiness, we can forget about the consequences of tomorrow… until they hit us with full force. Problems and worries – everyday or existential – attract us like a magnet, so it is quite difficult to live in the moment all the time. It is normal for us to worry about our future or reflect on the past, losing track of what is happening around us.
When we have problems or obstacles arise, it is understandable that emotions overwhelm us and our vision becomes blurred, so we stop paying attention to what is happening here and now. But in those cases, the solution is not to escape those emotions by pursuing enjoyment at all costs.
In fact, the objective of living in the moment is not only to hope to be well, but to understand reality. This understanding is what will make us feel better, find inner peace and face challenges with greater wisdom and serenity.
Living in the moment is not synonymous with hedonism but with consciousness. And sometimes that also means imbuing yourself with emotions that are not pleasant. Living in the moment is letting thoughts and emotions flow, instead of holding on to them. And accept that sometimes we will also get lost in the labyrinth of the past and the possibilities of the future.
No problem.
We simply must gently redirect our minds to the current moment. Ultimately, the idea of living in the moment is none other than “living” fully – the good and the bad – with awareness and gratitude.
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