Anxiety disorders are one of the most common psychopathologies. It is estimated that 25% of people will experience an anxiety disorder at some point in their lives. Therefore, it is likely that even if you don’t suffer from it, you know someone who does. The situation is so serious that anxiety has been classified as the “silent epidemic of this century.”
An anxious person experiences constant anguish from which they cannot escape, even though they know that many of the worries that torment them are not rational. Anxious people live in a constant state of anticipation, always waiting for something bad to happen. Obviously, this level of tension is very exhausting and ultimately takes a heavy toll, not only emotionally but also physically.
Relating to anxious people is also complicated because they can be very irritable and make rash decisions. Furthermore, their apprehension can become truly annoying and overwhelming. However, the key lies in understanding, in being able to put yourself in their shoes.
The things only people with anxiety understand that we should all know
Melissa McGlensey, editor of The Mighty, decided to ask people who live with anxiety how they would sum up their condition. Their words can help us understand the toll this disorder takes and how they feel. We can put ourselves in their shoes for a moment.
1. “We don’t need someone who looks at us like we’re crazy. We need someone who’s compassionate.” – Kristen Cunningham
Sometimes, the best balm to heal the wounds of the soul is understanding. Sometimes we just need to be there, letting the person who’s going through a hard time know they can count on us, without criticism, without reproach, without complaints.
2. “I’m being attacked by something I can’t escape” – Sherri Paricio Bornhoft
This person hasn’t chosen anxiety; rather, anxiety has chosen them. Anxious people want to get rid of these uncomfortable symptoms, but they don’t know how, and no matter how hard they try, they keep experiencing them. Sometimes they may feel as if they’re trapped in a maze with no way out, as they often relapse after a period of stability.
3. “Sometimes even the simplest task overwhelms me” – Rhonda Bodfield
Anxiety is a monster that drains our energy. Often, anxious people feel overwhelmed by seemingly simple tasks because they don’t know where to start, or they’re paralyzed by worries about things that could go wrong. In this case, the best option isn’t to criticize or try to minimize the problem, but simply to lend a hand so they can solve it.
4. “Just because I can’t explain the feelings that cause my anxiety doesn’t make it any less valid.” – Lauren Elizabeth
For someone living with anxiety, it’s difficult to put into words what they feel. However, this doesn’t mean their worries and feelings are any less real. In fact, the tendency to minimize their condition causes more harm than good. An anxious person doesn’t need someone to tell them that what they feel isn’t real, but rather someone to support them.
5. “All the logic in the world won’t stop the heart from beating in my chest.” – Rebecca V. Cowcill
People who suffer from anxiety often experience panic attacks. At that moment, their heart races, they find it difficult to breathe, and they fear dying. These intense symptoms cause a full-blown emotional hijacking. The emotional brain takes over and shuts down the rational brain. Therefore, although the anxious person may be perfectly aware that everything is in their mind, this is not enough to stop the symptoms.
6. “I know I worry about ridiculous things, but I can’t help it.” – Erika Strojny Myers
Anxious people tend to worry about details that, for most people, seem insignificant. This often happens because they anticipate events and always anticipate the worst-case scenario. However, just because they’re aware of it doesn’t mean they can avoid it; sometimes it’s as if their worries take on a life of their own. Therefore, the best thing we can do is help them take the first step, without recriminations.
7. “Just because you don’t understand what my fears mean, doesn’t mean they aren’t real.” – Vicki Happ
Just because we don’t share the anxious person’s feelings or worries doesn’t mean they don’t exist. When something is real in their mind, it becomes real in their daily life. If we think we can’t control a situation or that we won’t get through it successfully, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Finally, one person perfectly summed up what she needs from others: “ My mind is my enemy, so I need you by my side. Sometimes I just need you to fight alongside me .”
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