Before, it was easy to tell when you had become an adult. Generally, the path was marked by a series of cultural milestones that signaled that evolution, starting with the first day of school until the moment of getting the driver’s license, graduating, getting the first job and leaving home to form one’s own family.
Today that path is not so linear or simple, especially in Western society. In fact, in recent years we have begun to talk about “emerging adulthood” to refer to a new phase that occurs before fully entering adulthood.
What is emerging adulthood exactly?
Jeffrey Arnett was the one who proposed the concept of emerging adulthood to refer to the period of development between 18 and 25 years, although it could perfectly extend up to 30 years. This new life stage is a cultural result, fundamentally in the most industrialized societies where young people have more time to explore before fully entering adulthood.
The sociodemographic changes that have occurred in recent decades, such as broader access to university education and the postponement of life milestones such as marriage and having children, have meant that young people can enjoy more lax social roles and are not subject to regulatory expectations as rigid as decades ago.
According to Arnett, “Emerging adulthood is neither adolescence nor young adulthood, but is theoretically and empirically distinct from both.” This means that many of these young people can see themselves almost as adolescents and at other times as adults, which can be a challenge when it comes to relating to them, especially for adults.
Young people who resist maturing
Emerging adulthood is not only due to social changes, as confirmed by a study conducted at Concordia University. Parents also have their share of responsibility. In recent decades there has been a certain infantilization of youth. Not only because young people take longer to leave home, have a job or start a family, but because they are not prepared to face the complexities of life alone.
Many parents have interpreted the welfare state as an absence of problems, which has translated into hyperprotective behaviors. However, pampering children and then young people too much, to the point of falling into excess – sparing them the experiences of frustration and failure inherent to life – creates more problems than it solves.
Many of these pampered young people fail to develop the knowledge and skills necessary to face the challenges and commitments that come with adulthood. For this reason, although they advance on the calendar, they remain behind in terms of social, emotional and cognitive maturation.
A previous investigation had reflected that 71% of these young people were not clear about what was expected of them, in addition to presenting difficulties in other psychological areas. Many recognized to:
• Have difficulty making their own decisions
• Relying on material rewards or praise to feel valuable
• Constantly need external validation from their friends
• Need many things to feel good about themselves
• Feeling like they don’t need to grow up because others take care of them
In short, parents may have the best of intentions in paving the way for their children, but often this overprotection prevents them from having the experiences necessary to develop the skills that prepare them for adult life.
What characterizes emerging adults?
In the United States, 55% of young people under 30 are not completely financially independent from their parents, according to a Pew Research Center survey. In 2022, in Italy, 69.4% of those under 34 years of age still lived with their parents while in Spain the figure was 65.9%, according to Eurostat.
However, beyond economic dependence – which can be due to different structural factors – emerging adulthood also has its own psychological characteristics:
1. Exploration of identity
Emerging adulthood gives young people the chance to extend the phase of self-discovery. It allows them to continue exploring who they are and what they want in life. This is not a brief period of transition to adulthood, as occurred previously, but rather a much longer stage characterized by the search for vital interests in order to make important decisions for the future. Therefore, it becomes an essential phase for the formation of identity and the realization of vital projects.
2. Autofocus
Because the path to adulthood is no longer so linear or well-defined, emerging adulthood stands out as a period of relative independence from social roles and expectations. Young people are no longer subject to the rigid rules that parents used to impose on them during their childhood and adolescence, but they have not assumed the responsibilities of adulthood, so they do not respond to the ties and obligations that marriage or children entail. For that reason, they can afford to live a more adolescent-like lifestyle while focusing on themselves. In fact, this phase is not exempt from a certain level of egocentrism.
3. Instability
Emerging adulthood is, fundamentally, a period of change and instability, both in relationships, at work or even at home. Many of these young people are aware that they are in a kind of transition phase: they know that they are not adolescents, but they cannot feel fully adults. They begin to take on new responsibilities, but at the same time reject others. For this reason, many try to live as many experiences as possible, as if they were taking the last sips of “freedom”, which often leads them to practice risky behaviors.
Some prosper, others stay stuck
Emerging adulthood is a complex phenomenon determined by multiple factors, so the way young people go through this stage will depend greatly on the education received and their life circumstances.
For example, this phase is usually characterized by optimism, but in a society where young people see their expectations severely limited, it could transmute into pessimism. Likewise, young people who have been raised to be independent and autonomous are more likely to thrive through this stage, beginning a successful path toward career and family formation.
However, not everyone follows the same path. There are those who remain eternal teenagers, trapped in a kind of Peter Pan syndrome, for a long time. These young people resist growing up and leaving their comfort zone because they feel relatively comfortable under the protection of their parents, without having to assume obligations or make important life decisions.
Many emerging adults have trouble becoming independent because they are afraid to face the problems that their parents have always solved for them. However, it is essential to keep in mind that 30 is not the new 20.
The new generations do not have a kind of “life extension”, a 10-year bonus to settle down, train more or decide what they want and organize themselves. By the time they reach their 30s, many may feel enormous pressure to achieve career success or own their own home.
As a result, some will put pressure on themselves to achieve all the milestones they have postponed, but they will have a double challenge before them: do it well and in record time. Others will probably settle for what they find when they panic, which can be a sentence to life dissatisfaction for their next decades.
A few final words
Of course, success in this transition depends largely on the help and understanding they receive from their closest support network and the opportunities that society provides them. Parents must find the middle ground, so that they do not put too much pressure on their children, but without falling into extreme indulgence.
And young people must be aware that living thinking that they have all the time in the world leads them to lose it or invest it poorly, either by making the wrong decisions or missing out on opportunities. Just because society tells you that 30 is the new 20 doesn’t mean that the biological clock stops. The years keep ticking, so the sooner you dare to make conscious decisions that make you responsible for your life, the better.
References:
Bredehoft, D. (2014) Raising children in an age of overindulgence. NCFR Report; 59(2): 5.
Arnett, J. (2000) Emerging Adulthood A Theory of Development From the Late Teens Through the Twenties. American Psychologist, 55(5), 469–480.
Bredehoft, D. J. et. Al. (1998) Perceptions attributed by adults to parental overindulgence during childhood. Journal of Marriage and Family Consumer Sciences Education; 16: 3-17.
Minkin, R. et. Al. (2024) Parents, young adult children and the transition to adulthood. En: Pew Research Center.
(2023) Share of young adults aged 18-34 living with their parents by age and sex – EU-SILC survey. In: Eurostat.
Leave a Reply