From the time we are young, we are taught to have a purpose. Society is quick to tell us that we should set our sights on a goal and not stray from it. Coaches and gurus warn us that if we want to go far, we must have a purpose in life. Even Friedrich Nietzsche said that “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
And yet, perhaps that is one of our main problems: we set ourselves so many ambitious goals that they end up overwhelming us, taking up a large part of our time and energy, so that in the long run, instead of becoming an incentive to live, they take up every minute, pushing us to focus on a future that does not yet exist.
Life as a business plan
The philosopher Byung-Chul Han pointed out that one of the risks of considering life as a “business” is that our existence becomes a frenetic and somewhat short-sighted competition in which we are “masters” and “slaves” at the same time. We become people who exploit ourselves to achieve goals that are often not even aligned with our true dreams and illusions, just because they are the achievements we are supposed to reach.
At a social level, everything pushes us to “achieve more” or “be better.” Ultimately, these messages urge us to see our lives as a kind of business plan with well-defined objectives, precisely designed programs and, of course, a risk control strategy so that nothing goes off track.
This market vocabulary has been transferred to our existence and we have assumed and internalized it without questioning it, because we believe it is the most rational and useful way to manage our main asset: life.
But the truth is that life is not meant to be taken advantage of – in the material sense of the term – but to be lived and experienced. As Søren Kierkegaard famously says : “Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.”
By treating life as a balance sheet of gains and losses, we fall into the trap of measuring our worth based on results. Experiences cease to be meaningful in themselves and become stepping stones toward goals that often do not even fulfill us.
But the worst thing of all is that when we realize that we cannot achieve certain goals and that our emotional investment has been wasted, we feel frustrated and experience it as a personal “failure” or a lack of ability. We convince ourselves that if we do not achieve it, it is because we did not try hard enough. We blame ourselves. We recriminate. We beat ourselves up. And we go back to the charge, with other goals in our backpack.
And yet, in some cases what we need is not new goals, but to rediscover the meaning of purposelessness.
The trap of goals
Our brain is programmed to look for patterns and assign meanings, but sometimes in the effort to find meaning in something that has none, our mind becomes complicated, tangled up in itself, getting lost in a thousand and one concerns. For this reason, it would be worth asking ourselves: why does the task of living not seem sufficient in itself and we feel obliged to look for complementary “objectives”?
If we spend almost all our time focused on achieving one goal after another, we are likely to develop tunnel vision that prevents us from seeing and taking advantage of the different pleasant “detours” that life, in its infinite richness, offers us.
Anything that doesn’t fit our preconceived notions of where we should go and how we should get there is likely to be dismissed as reckless, superfluous or unwarranted. And yet, often these “detours” are a key part of our emotional well-being or even developing creativity.
A study conducted at Japan’s Open University found that both ikigai and shiawase are essential for well-being. Ikigai refers to finding the reason for being while shiawase indicates a feeling of delight and peace oriented toward the present. Both, in close harmony, reduce the risk of heart attacks, strokes, dementia, stroke and depression, lengthening life expectancy and quality of life.
When you have no purpose, you have freedom
When we let go of the pressure to meet a goal, we can enjoy every step of the way and even dare to explore without fear of failure. It is these seemingly purposeless activities that lead us to experience a state of natural happiness – not the prefabricated happiness associated with having a seemingly perfect life.
What are those purposeless behaviors?
Throwing a ball in the air just to experience the childish satisfaction of catching it. Playing with your pet or even having long conversations with it. Staring at the sea. Drawing mandalas, doodling or painting anything that comes to mind, for the simple pleasure of doing so, without trying to emulate Michelangelo or Botticelli. Watching the clouds pass by and playing at finding images in their shapes. Singing, dancing or getting lost (metaphorically) in the forest listening to the harmony of nature…
There are an almost infinite number of other supposedly “superfluous” activities, with no purpose. Anything can fit in, as long as we enjoy it and have no ulterior motives.
In fact, do you remember how you played when you were a child?
You didn’t have a goal in mind, you were just having fun.
Such behavior, which is focused on mere pleasure rather than on achieving a goal, is untimely, spontaneous and aimless. It has no pragmatic motive, does not lead to a reward and is not competitive or intended to impress anyone, but rather involves intrinsic satisfaction. It is initiated simply by the innocent and fun enjoyment of it.
It is not impulsive, but spontaneous. It is neither involuntary nor reckless, so it is far from self-destructive hedonism. Although it is not directed toward achieving anything in particular, this healthy lack of purpose satisfies a fundamental need of the “self”: to enjoy.
The interesting thing is that while we are immersed in these activities, our sense of limitation disappears, as does our shyness or fears. Immersed in this world, we experience our essential freedom. The lightness intrinsic to these activities helps us to relieve accumulated tensions, leave sadness behind and get rid of worries, achieving a state of inner peace and a feeling of well-being.
This lack of purpose, understood as not planning for the future, is inextricably linked to pleasure. We do not worry about results, judgment or criticism but simply about squeezing the most out of the present moment. That makes the activity rewarding in itself.
Unfortunately, this behaviour fades away as we grow older and begin to plan. The spontaneous behaviours we enjoy then transmute into tasks that lead to a pre-established goal. The former is often considered childish and superfluous. The latter is useful and mature.
Lack of purpose, an opportunity to reinvent yourself
Of course, it is not about leading an empty, meaningless life or turning into leaves blown by the wind. Nor is it about forgetting about our goals. Nothing of the sort.
It is about how, in the face of the stress of a life full of goals, plans and projections, we can consider a fuller and more relaxed existence focused on the joy of being. It involves understanding life itself as a purpose.
Ultimately, all these purposeless actions are actually soul-feeding experiences. What may seem useless on a social level can be extremely valuable on a psychological level.
Therefore, the feeling of lack of purpose can be an opportunity to rethink everything and find a much deeper meaning that acts transversally and allows us to enjoy the only thing we really have: life.
References:
Boreham, I. D. & Schutte, N. S. (2023) The relationship between purpose in life and depression and anxiety: A meta-analysis. Journal of Clinical Psychology; 79(12): 2736-2767.
Kumano, M. (2018) On the Concept of Well-Being in Japan: Feeling Shiawaseas Hedonic Well-Being and Feeling Ikigai as Eudaimonic Well-Being. Applied Research Quality Life; 13: 419–433.
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