When you look in the mirror and notice that you are different from everyone else, your first reaction is to feel afraid. Confusion sets in and you ask yourself thousands of questions: Why am I different? Why do I perceive things differently? Why do things bother me that others can easily overlook? Why don’t I fit in?
Highly Sensitive People, who represent approximately 20% of the population, are familiar with this feeling. From childhood, they realize that they are different from others because they have a special sensitivity that can sometimes become a heavy burden as it generates many problems in their interpersonal relationships.
Highly Sensitive People are those who react intensely to stimuli in their environment. Because they are hypersensitive, situations that go unnoticed by others are very annoying to them and can even cause physical symptoms, such as dizziness or headaches. Bright lights, certain sounds, textures and smells, as well as clutter, can trigger exaggerated reactions, while other people hardly notice these details.
Of course, this sensitivity extends to all areas of their life and can make people feel misunderstood, as if they were a “freak.” In addition, being constantly exposed to so many stimuli often leads to irritability, so it is not unusual for interpersonal relationships to suffer.
It is now known that certain areas of the brain of these people function differently. A study conducted at the University of California revealed that the brain areas related to consciousness, emotions and empathy showed a substantially greater blood flow, compared to that seen in the brains of people who have a lower sensitivity. This indicates that these areas react more intensely to stimuli, thus triggering an excessive response.
However, there is no reason to be discouraged, being a Highly Sensitive Person also has its advantages. In fact, being different is neither better nor worse, you just need to learn to take advantage of your strengths.
The main gifts of highly sensitive people
- The gift of emotional knowledge
From a young age, Highly Sensitive People begin to see the world with a mixture of curiosity and anxiety. Their eyes are capable of capturing small details that go unnoticed by others, such as the frustrated grimace on the teacher’s face when they have given a wrong answer or the worried expression on their mother’s face.
Highly Sensitive People have a special gift for picking up on the microexpressions that reveal the feelings of others. It is true that understanding the emotions of others makes us more vulnerable to their pain, but it also puts us in a privileged position to be able to help them. They are also a compass that allows us to better guide our behavior in social contexts.
The trick is not to take other people’s emotional reactions too seriously, to learn to adopt an emotional distance. In fact, you’ve probably been told on more than one occasion, “the problem is that you’re too sensitive .” And it’s true, you’re more vulnerable but you also have greater emotional knowledge, you’re a more empathetic person, who can easily put themselves in someone else’s shoes and connect deeply with their “self.”
- The gift of intuitive intelligence
Highly Sensitive People have a sharper intuition. This is because they are able to pick up on a greater number of details in their environment and give them a coherent meaning, in order to draw the most probable conclusion. It is an automatic process; they do not have to think, just feel, their unconscious takes care of the rest.
These people find it more difficult to make conscious decisions because they often feel overwhelmed by the number of options and feel that they are unable to analyze them one by one. However, in many cases they just have to listen to their intuition.
Intuitive Intelligence is a skill that we are all born with, but it wears down with age, crushed by the weight of an eminently rationalist education. Therefore, do not waste this gift and listen more to what your heart has to say.
- The gift of enjoying solitude
Most Highly Sensitive People find pleasure in solitude. They are not hermits, but they love to have moments of solitude to pursue their hobbies or just to think. In a society where everyone is running around trying to fill their time with inconsequential tasks, just because they don’t want to be alone with themselves, the gift of solitude is rare.
However, it is only in solitude that you will be able to connect with your most intimate self. You will be able to look inside yourself to get to know yourself better, to know what you really want. A person who knows how to be alone with themselves is a mature person who is not afraid of their thoughts and emotions.
Knowing how to be alone, without boredom taking over and without the unhealthy need for someone or something to fill the existential void is an enormous gift. Don’t waste it trying to fit into society because knowing how to relate to others is just as important as knowing how to relate to yourself.
- The gift of living intensely
Highly Sensitive People live intensely, from the heart. It is not that they constantly seek out activities that generate adrenaline, nor are they very fond of change and do not like risks, but their inner life is very rich.
These people have the ability to live each emotion intensely, so they can give themselves unreservedly to a relationship, commit to just causes and greatly enjoy small details that for the rest of people are insignificant, such as a sunset, a song or a painting.
Highly Sensitive People are able to live from the heart, to give themselves fully to what they do and to find beauty in the small details. This is undoubtedly an exceptional gift, especially in a society where many people have become true addicts to stimuli, always unsatisfied and in search of new sensations to numb the inner emptiness.
- The gift of personal growth
We all have the capacity to grow emotionally, but the heightened sensitivity of Highly Sensitive People makes their path much easier. In fact, while most people tend to lock themselves away in their comfort zone, which becomes increasingly narrower as the years go by, Highly Sensitive People often embark on a journey of inner knowledge that sets them free. For this reason, they are often compared to an “old soul”.
These people are more inclined to look inside themselves, to connect emotionally with others and to appreciate the details around them. Therefore, once they overcome the initial phase, marked by the frustration of realizing that they are different, they can embark on a path of rediscovering the “self.”
So don’t waste that gift. Find your own balance and embark on that journey, the things you will discover about yourself will be amazing.
Reference:
Bianca, P. A. et. Al. (2014) The highly sensitive brain: an fMRI study of sensory processing sensitivity and response to others’ emotions. Brain and Behavior; 4(4): 580-594.
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